In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt

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If you’re dating men who don’t want to get married or it’s just not a priority for them, there’s nothing you can do to make them change their minds. The problem is a lot of the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this time, they’ll say all that good stuff you just said, but then they forget to mention they have 1-2 kids Full transparency. 23. Not married. American, so I couldn’t know about any Canadian particulars for your problem. So take me with a grain of salt. First off, talk to your dad. Your last bit in the original post rang an alarm bell in my head that you’re after marriage solely so he can die “knowing his daughters are being taken care of by good men”. Even should you get married, there’s a non zero chance it might be after he’s gone. Talk to him on that. If only to see if he’s actually worried about not being able to hand you off. Secondly, prayer. I assume you’re Christian, on account of being a North American conservative. I could be wrong. If not, God’s the one you should be going to. Not a bunch of randoms on the internet. Even if you aren’t religious, should probably start. As others have mentioned, if you’re a conservative woman, you probably want a conservative man. Who is likely to be religious. So religion and God is definitely going to be an important distinction between “you’re girlfriend material” and “you’re wife material”. Adding onto the conservative man thing, single fathers. Their God-mandated “go forth and multiply” has already happened, so while more kids would likely be nice, I assume they wouldn’t be a deal breaker if they can’t happen. And already having a kid means they know how to raise someone. Probably bonus points if you have a son and it’s a guy with a daughter. I’m not conservative, but the idea of finally having that male child to bond with might be appealing.

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I don’t know if Canadian politics is as much of a shit show as American politics, but beliefs inform so much of how a person interacts with the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this world and other people that it could definitely be a deal breaker. Like the hypothetical example of a woman not wanting to be with a conservative man if he’d fight her on having an abortion if she wasn’t ready for a family yet. Since that belief and being conservative go hand in hand, a person might run off from a relationship because they don’t want to get involved. So that’s probably another thing to consider. Do you two agree enough on issues? Or have you mutually agreed that it’s alright to disagree on some things and discuss it like adults? Depending on how “traditional” you are, you definitely have an uphill battle. Traditional men who ought to do the proposing, but also fine with a woman with a kid who almost certainly makes more than him, when his (and, presumably, your by extension) “traditional values” also say he should be the breadwinner.
You, frankly, should swallow your pride and be open to proposing yourself. The kid might be a pain point. The money is almost certainly going to be. His pride might be keeping him from proposing, even if he wants to. So if there’s any chance those traditional values you cling to so much could be stopping a man who loves you from proposing because he won’t be “doing his job” as provider or something, what’s more important? Actually getting married and bucking tradition a single time to ask him a question? Or remaining on your high horse and potentially losing him after a relationship that lasts half a decade? P.S I think I saw a comment where you mentioned being engaged to your child’s father before he cheated. If I’m remembering that correctly, what was different? How have you changed since then that one man was willing to propose and now none of them are?

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P.P.P.S Since I am neither married nor conservative, you probably don’t care for my answer to your original question. But I may as well. I probably don’t see myself marrying a conservative woman. The label “conservative” comes with implications of her disagreeing with me on things that would be no negotiable, or expecting too much of a stereotypically masculine role out of me, the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this writer and gamer who doesn’t give a damn about sports or guns. Stereotypes, yes. But if she embodied them in any way, it just wouldn’t work. I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with someone I don’t enjoy being around. Someone with common interests so we can engage in them together. Someone who, even if we weren’t together, couldn’t be a friend.
P.P.P.P.S What even is your “tradition”? What is “the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this man’s job”? Taking a knee, pulling out the ring, and saying the four magic words? Because if that’s it, your pride is 100% the problem. If the issue is that the man should say “Will you marry me?” and years have passed without anything happening, sit that fucker down and say “Either you propose, or we’re done.” Your intent and desire is made clear. Your pride is saved. Your “tradition” is preserved. No ambiguity. If he wanted marriage but was dragging his feet for whatever reason, he knows that’s not on the table anymore. If he isn’t interested in marriage, he leaves, because you two wouldn’t have worked out anyway. Everyone wins. Either that or explicitly ask “You said you were interested in marriage. What’s going on? Is there something the matter with our relationship that’s keeping you from taking it to the next level?” My wife and I met when I was 31. It took a while to find my person, but it happened. To quote Steve Martin: “There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.”
Before I met my wife, I had been in a string of long term relationships (2-4 years). What ended most of them was very simple: I didn’t want children (and still do not!). I think these former partners eventually felt like they were wasting their time as they ultimately wanted families, so we broke up. I was lucky to meet my spouse. She was adamant about not wanting kids, had qualities I needed (intelligent, loving, emotionally expressive), and, most important, seemed like she wanted to be with me more than she seemed to want anything else. It was the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this first time that I felt like I was someone’s highest level need/priority AND that I was compatible with them on the children issue. I met my wife in summer of 2020 and we got married the next year, why do you think you keep dating for longer than a college degree takes without it coming up? If after a year they aren’t willing to even entertain the notion then drop them. There wasn’t any single deciding factor for me, she just caught my attention in a way nobody else ever had. I wanted to be with her all the time but not in that frantic puppy love way, I just suddenly felt life was boring without her around.
What really convinced me she was marriage material though was when we started having conversations about finances and big life goals. We were probably 90% aligned on those big questions and since that’s a very important area of life for me I knew she was a real catch. Since our wedding day the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this longest we’ve been apart is about 14 hours and not getting bored of each other so far. With a high income and clear interest in marriage, seek a matchmaker. Uncommon in the West, but you already know what you want. No need to waste six more precious years. I have the opposite situation. I was a very late starter career-wise. I usually couldn’t afford rent on my own. I have had a couple of YEARS of unemployment. I honestly am not a good investment. And yet I have rarely struggled getting a commitment from men.
Men like making more money and providing for women. It makes them feel masculine. They commit to me, not you, because I am more helpless and weak. Being a highly qualified, highly intelligent, extremely hard working woman, you look for higher quality partners than I do. You would never put up with the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this things I put up with and I’m getting more commitment from men that would commit to you but are rejected very quickly by you. You don’t have long periods of time to really focus on fucking. Let me tell you, the times I’ve made connections to guys who really wanted to commit to me, there was a few months of very excellent, very irresponsible sex. I was unemployed or underemployed and didn’t have anything to do the next day. I could stay up late. I could get wasted. I was a lot of fun. While, on paper, very few men would check ‘unemployed chick who lets me do butt stuff’ over ‘beautiful, professional who lets me do butt stuff”, I do think the chemicals involved in those intense, months really imprinted me onto partners. I don’t have a plan. You have a plan. Some men are scared of plans. I just kind of wander through life, stumbling up. Men rescue me. Men come up with plans. The pressure coming from me, especially in my 20s and 30s, was very, very low. So men imposed their plans on my life. And I sort of went along with things. I think a LOT of men carry a vision in their head of a nuclear family. It’s something they want to choose, not something they want to be trapped into. Is this fair? Is this a sexist thing to think? Dunno. I just know that having no fucking plan (other than fucking), has given me the controlling hand in relationships. I don’t look like I have it but I am usually the one to walk away and I rarely get dumped. It’s happened but not without cause.
I’m sure people have excellent advice for you here. I only have shitty advice. But here its is: get very fucking drunk and have a lot of very good sex with someone who doesn’t make sense on paper. Don’t take them seriously. Don’t look for a relationship. Politely resist a relationship but don’t reject them. That’s the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this father of your first kid. For me, it was (1) I don’t want to imagine life without her and (2) I’m pretty sure the practicalities of life will be easier with her. This is a long shot, but did you have problems relating to your first boyfriends, maybe siblings even, or have a largely missing or distand parent (of either sex)? Those things, generally ‘family-of-origin issues’, tend to complicate relationships for people who manage okay or even thrive in like literally all other areas of life. So if there’s something inexplicable going on with a person’s relationships (e.g. ability to attract people or ‘keep’ them or relate to them), it goes back to childhood as if Freud was right, and/or it goes to some form of neurodivergence, where high-functional autism, Asperger’s or ADHD tends to complicate relationships more than other areas of life, and — I would say — tends to complicate dating more than marriage.
Bottom line, if one doesn’t know what it is about, it’s probably about childhood and/or neurodivergence, and the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this two obviously often combine. It could also be that your negative outcomes are each explicable on an individual level, which would make it look coincidental, but there is an inexplicably long streak of such individually explicable ‘losses’ — that too would suggest a common denominator in childhood or neurodivergence. And because the problem is so difficult to even identify, I wouldn’t count on it being easy enough to fix on your own or with a friend or some other caring soul in lieu of professional assistance. This is some advanced stuff that you need to get a hold of someone who has advanced training in. Normal human wisdom and experience often won’t suffice, knowledge based on scientific research may be necessary (at least if you don’t happen to have a very insightful friend or relative).
On a common-sense level, street smarts more than book smarts, I would say that if your partners marry soon after breaking up with you, it means they were looking for the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this long term, whether they knew it or not (and it’s possible they often didn’t know or even thought they didn’t want it), but for some reason they couldn’t find that with you. As in close, but not yet there. Or it’s possible that another gal, ekhm, pushed their hand bit, to seal the deal, in a way that you had had too much of a noble, freedom-respecting mindset to do. For example, as a young man, half my life ago, I realized that those guys who were less scrupulous and more prepared to just put psychological pressure on the girl to be with them, got the girl whereas I didn’t. I’m sure the vice versa also works.
Another thing that occurs to me from my own experience is the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this old adage that a faint heart never won a lady, which probably also is a unisex feature — basically, if we are conflicted about someone, not fully sold on them, it shows and we don’t have the strength, magnetism or charisma, the sort of convincing or compelling air to push things through. We aren’t fully invested or fully on board, and the results suffer for it. It would perhaps have been better to keep on looking, although of course one worries (and rightly) that being too fussy can lead to eternal singledom. But the gals who rejected me, often without an apparent reason? I’ll tell you a secret, I too was conflicted about them, often in major ways. I did want them, but I saw obstacles and problems and stuff in their personality that I’d rather not have to deal with.
I’m not trying to convince you to see something that isn’t there, but just suggesting that if you were in fact conflicted, then that may have shown, in subconsciously noticeable ways (which works just like the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this conscious ways but the analysis is under the table, not above, so you can’t put your hands on the specifics). So perhaps your exes saw no future in the relationship and took an exit. At the same time, the experience they gained in the relationship with you allowed them to assess different relationships faster, so they avoided the long period of indecision the next time. This relates to the ‘very close but not there’ that I mentioned earlier on, a place I also often happened to end up in — you know, the second place; ever the silver medallist or runner up. If this is the case with you, then you probably need to be more selective and decisive with guys who appear kinda okay but not quite yet there, so it’s difficult to let go of them, although they aren’t keepers. The difficult part is overcoming that difficulty. (Or perhaps, just perhaps, depending on the nature of the problem with them, accepting that they are flawed keepers but still keepers.)
Re: ‘experiencing a proposal’, I don’t have much experience there, but I think if you’re less experienced there (never got to betrothal stage) also and expecting the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this guy to do most of the active moves, then perhaps you may be, shall we say, jokingly of course, less married than the gals who go out to meet the guy halfway (mutual initiative), or give him a prod or nudge (guy’s initiative on gal’s initiative). This is part of the problem of the modern times — we can’t have a cake and eat it too. If we have the woman as an independent and strong agent in her own right, we can’t also really have her alternating submissive or even passive roles versus the man, so, as a logical consequence, the notion of a man single-handedly winning a woman over isn’t really viable any more, and two independent equals should ideally be meeting themselves halfway and making the joint decison to spend the rest of their lives together, taking joint initiative and authorship of that decision and joint responsibility for the outcome, rather than the initiative and responsibility resting on the man, which is only defensible if the woman is not an independent agent but a precious charge.
My dad and his friends all were pressured to propose by their girlfriends and they’re happily married decades later. The man supposedly takes the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this initiative but women apply pressure, sometimes to the point of ultimatim. So you’re in a long term relationship now..why don’t you actually ask him if he feels like marriage is in your future? If you want to get married communication is something you need to be capable of I know you’re asking for men’s opinions, so I don’t want to step on any toes replying as a bi-woman, but I find that line a little concerning. Why don’t you feel deserving of it? In my personal experience, when we don’t love ourselves enough, sometimes we unknowingly dump a lot of our insecurities onto our partners. It can start to feel for them, as if they have to essentially caregive for us, by babysitting our own self confidence. Constantly needing to reassure a partner that they’re attractive, loved, and deserving of our their affection can eventually become what feels like a full time job. It can become exhausting. In time, if we don’t seek help to work on our own wellbeing and develop healthier mindsets towards ourselves, a partner may also start to feel like things are never going to improve, and while they may care deeply for you, realize that they can’t be your therapist and your partner forever. That combined with what may be a lot of pressure to get married, which I mention because it seems very important to you so I imagine it’s come up a lot in your relationships too, can be a lot for a partner to handle. It’s hard to let things develop organically into a marriage when the pressure to get married is an expectation early on.
I may be completely off base with this, but I’ve experienced this from both sides of the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this fence with both male and female partners. I’ve been the one feeling insecure, and I’ve also been the emotional caregiver. It’s not a great experience on either side of it. I replied because for myself personally, these are both things I noticed in your post that I would feel concerned about if I were interested in dating you myself. But having lost my own Dad when I was only 20, and now my Mum is terminally ill, I can completely understand and relate to the desire to have the happy memory of your Dad walking you down the isle on your wedding day. Mine never will. That hurts a lot. So I am not at all judging you for wanting that before you don’t have the chance anymore. But my journey alongside my Mum fighting cancer, knowing that it’s only a matter of time, I’ve done a lot of therapy to help me through it. One thing I have learned, is that you can’t force something to happen just so that it can fit into the timeline your parent has left. It doesn’t feel like you imagine it will. It feels sort of hollow, and lacking in the genuine happiness you should be feeling. Deep down you know you’ve forced it to happen before it should, and the reasoning feels so just that it’s super hard to admit that to yourself.
Perhaps you might consider some counselling for yourself. It helps a lot with processing the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this impending loss of a loved one, and it helps a lot with finding your own sense of self and figuring out how to find your own joy in life. Personally, I find one of the most attractive qualities in a partner to be their own individuality. They need to be capable of loving themselves, and making themselves happy too, in order for me to feel I can have a healthy relationship with them. Even if they haven’t gotten there yet, knowing they’re putting in the effort to give themselves that gift is attractive to me. I don’t know if this is helpful to you, but I hope you’re able to find your own personal joy in life, a joy that is not dependent on the unpredictability of other people. When you love yourself a lot, people will notice, and they can’t help but love you too.
I was just saying to my friends last night that everyone I know who is married is somewhat miserable. I dunno. I don’t think it’s for me. Honestly idk because I haven’t dated anyone at all. I’ve gone on a few dates with women my age but they ghost me. Now I’m looking for older women since they are actually serious about dating. If it makes you feel any better, same boat, different side. They always leave. I want to marry them, and they always leave. Get treated right then wonder if they can do better. I mainly just comes down to a tipping scale. On one side are all the In November we wearr blue Diabetes Awareness Thanksgiving shirt moreover I will buy this great things about you. On the other side are all the flaws. Once guys see that the flaws outweigh the perks, they become disinterested.

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